Yoko Ono at MOMA

We are at the age now where we occasionally feel old nostalgic for long-forgotten moments of our past.  They pop up at totally unexpected times and remind us how long it was since we were teenagers.  For example, this weekend the local rock and roll station played songs by a quartet of lads from Liverpool so popular that concert halls could not hold all their fans, and they had to perform at Shea Stadium.  They got the idea because it has now been fifty - yes, that's 5-0 - years since the Beatles performed there.  If you remember that (we do), that should give you a twinge of nostalgia.

It was also the forty-sixth anniversary of Woodstock, another milestone for many of us.

But for a real wallop of nostalgia, what could beat a live concert by Yoko Ono and the Plastic Ono Band, which we went to see on Saturday night at the Museum of Modern Art, where a retrospective of her work is also on view?

We weren't allowed to take pictures of the concert itself, so our two photos of Yoko were taken surreptitiously immediately afterward, when the audience was beginning to rise in standing ovation. While we were waiting for the concert to start, we were treated to "Bottoms", a 1966 film by Yoko and FLUXUS Group. Each of 365 derrieres-in-motion filled the screen, one at a time. Needless to say, it set the tone for the rest of the evening and made it obvious that Yoko hadn't lost her sense of humor -- or of anarchy.

Born in 1933, Ono is now 82 years old. She looked quite small and frail on stage and even had to pause the show at one point to ask her guitarist open her water bottle, but she can still sing at full throttle.  Behind her, throughout the hour long event, were videos we assume to be of herself and her family in the 1930s.

The small concert hall held only 200 seats, and made for a very intimate experience.  Leaving the theater, we saw this couple ahead of us in marvelous white suits.  Imagine what fun they must have had getting dressed.

MOMA's exhibition "Yoko Ono: One Woman Show 1960 - 1971" runs through September 7th. So make haste to see it. Many may be surprised to learn how long Yoko was a working artist, painting, drawing, filming, performing and exhibiting in New York, long before she ever met John Lennon.

Her irreverence was evident at every turn.  This 1961 piece, "Painting to be Stepped On" (sumi ink on canvas, ink on paper), was just that.

Her 1964 "Bag Piece", first performed during Perpetual Fluxfest, Cinematique, New York, on June 27, 1965, has been recreated at MOMA and visitors are invited to don the black bag and perform on a 6" raised wooden platform. The photo below is of an intrepid museum-goer rolling around the floor and stretching out in the bag in a number of very non-yoga poses. Truth be told, although Valerie had arranged for both of us to be in the same black bag at the same time (or possibly two black bags at the same time - we're not exactly sure), Jean chickened out, in no small part because of fear of both of us stumbling off the platform and injuring ourselves. It is a well-documented fact that we are both klutzes.  Can you imagine the risks inherent in the two of us performing in a big black bag (in which we couldn't see what was going on outside or inside?) in a strange space -- on a raised platform?

Yoko's first solo gallery show was at AG Gallery, New York, July 17-30, 1961. The poster for "Paintings and Drawings by Yoko Ono" was designed by Yoko and George Maciunas.

Her 1967 "Half-a-Room" features artfully arranged domestic objects cut in half, most painted in white. Anyone who ever experienced roommate or spousal issues may have fantasized about creating a similar domestic arrangement.

"Painting to Hammer a Nail" from 1961 consists of a painted wood panel, nails, metal chain and painted hammer.

Her 1961 "Painting in 3 Stanzas" is made of sumi ink on canvas, vine, wood, aluminum, thumbtacks and cotton cord.

Yoko's "Water Drop Painting (Version 1)" dates from 1961 and is of sumi ink and water on canvas, glass bottle and cotton cord.

Ono has been a controversial figure most of her life.  She has her champions and her critics (don't we all?!), but for those of us wondering if we can retain our vibrancy, relevance and love of life as we move through the '-genarian' phases of life, she sets a wonderful example. In closing, ponder the words of her famous poster.

GHOST IN THE MACHINE

Last Friday night, in a very lucky encounter, we ran into Chloe Pang on 1st Avenue and Houston Street.  Although it had been more than a year since we'd seen each other, we picked up right where we'd left off eons ago.  When she mentioned that she's downtown a lot, we talked Chloe into meeting us the next day at the mural of Godzilla and Gamera to scope it out for last Sunday's blog posting on The Lazy, Hazy Days of Summer.

Chloe is arguably one of the most multi-talented people we know: a classically trained concert pianist, artist, milliner and photographer! But most importantly, she is always up for anything. Aha! How many people do you know think it a perfectly reasonable proposal to help us photograph ourselves being attacked by and putting our heads inside the open mouth of Godzilla? Not too many, we bet. On top of that, she's not only a knock out, but as you can see, she is also blessed with a wonderful sense of whimsy. The perfect accomplice!

Chloe exposed us to a new way of photographing ourselves with our iphones. The effect is what we've dubbed "the ghost in the machine". (Click on photos to enlarge.)

Perhaps if we understood it better, we could explain it to you. Suffice it to say, the result creates an interesting illusion of multiple incarnations of a person in the same frame. By chance, once again, we ended up in coordinated outfits, this time in black and white -- with straw hats -- Valerie in Kokin and Jean in Henrik Vibskov. Luckily, last Saturday, even the weather cooperated with mercifully low humidity.

Using the panorama setting on her iphone, Chloe photographed us walking across the front of the wonderfully colorful mural. In this case, where it makes Valerie look like she's chasing herself, each of the images is clear.

Through some other voodoo, Chloe could also create a wonderfully slow-mo blurred effect, enhanced by Valerie's fancy footwork.

Jean just had to get into the act.  If Valerie could be a twin, then by golly, she would be a triplet.

The sci-fi effects were perfect for Gamera and Godzilla. Needless to say, until we can figure out how to do this ourselves, we'll just sit back and enjoy Chloe's handiwork. Happy trails, people!

THOSE LAZY, HAZY, CRAZY DAYS OF SUMMER

GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN

We saw this fantastic mural painted on a wall, and because it's too hot to work or travel or dress up, to say nothing of doing a thought-provoking post, we decided it would be a low budget way to have fun if we could photograph ourselves in front of it.   It's a huge mural, so we're going to do a slow reveal.

Here we are, peaceful, law-abiding citizens, threatened by the reappearance after all these years of Godzilla!  (You can tell it's lower Manhattan by the Freedom Tower behind him.)

But wait!  As if that weren't enough, Gamera, the giant turtle, is menacing midtown Manhattan.  (You can tell by the Empire State Building.)

In our first moments of terror, we are nearly overcome by the powers of evil.  (Double click for better effect.)

But in a flash we gather our wits, and fight the enemy on his own terms, save the city, and live happily ever after.  (Yes, double click here too.)

We have to thank the beautiful, talented and very good natured director/milliner Camilla, who happened by this afternoon just as we were about to start working on this project.  Camilla asked if she could photograph our hats, and before she knew it, we had roped her into taking a dozen of us in return for as many photos as she wanted, on a different background.  She has a GREAT eye, and saved us at least an hour of labor we would have needed to set up our tripod and camera timer.

And most of all, thanks to Ichibantei Japanese restaurant (that's their name in the center of the mural), which put up this hilarious story in glorious technicolor, when they could have put up nothing, or mere dull advertising.  KUDOS to you, Ichibantei!

BOXING AT BERGDORF'S

May the best ma'am win!

PLUS: A Dab More on Lipstick 

(scroll waaaaaay down)

Last Sunday started out with our perusing the marvels at IF Boutique in Soho and looking for new eyeglass frames at Fabulous Fanny's in the East Village, and ended up with boxing in the men's annex at Bergdorf Goodman's on Fifth Avenue and sipping cocktails at the bar in the Baccarat Hotel. And all while wearing hats!  What's that you say? Your Sundays don't work like this? Tsk, tsk, dear readers. It's amazing what hijinks one (or two) can get up to.  One just has to put one's mind to it.

As you can see from the blur in the photo, Jean's lighting fast moves are too quick even for the camera to keep up with.

This tomfoolery all started when Valerie saw designer Elisabeth Weinstock's neon blue python skin gloves in a Bergdorf display window, with matching soccer balls and baseballs, and just about dragged Jean uptown a few days later to seize the gloves the opportunity.  Many thanks have to go to the Bergdorf employees who aided and abetted - or benignly neglected - us.  Remember, they've seen it all and done it all (did you see Scatter My Ashes at Bergdorf's?), so we were probably just all-in-a-day's-work for them.

Here, Jean demonstrates her right jab and Valerie shows off her left upper cut.  If you're going to fight with your BFF, isn't this the way to do it?  In living color, with a top-of-the-line product?  That retails for $1,500.00? And notice the hats never leave our heads.   Readers, that is the essence of technique.

Here is Elisabeth Weinstock Design's graphic pink and black soccer ball.  The perfect birthday gift for David Beckham, no?

Weinstock's two-toned snake baseball is appropriately named "Baltimore".  The fact that one hit from a major league batter could conceivably shred the covering right off the ball does nothing to diminish its allure.

The texture of the boxing gloves is the focal point.  This lilac and black pair from her website is made of water snake and retails for a cool $1,450.00.

This similarly priced pair of cobalt blue sueded Italian water snake is a tantalizing variation on the theme.

Is your bank balance somewhere south of Donald Trump's? Never fear! A quick check on the internet reveals a wide range of colorful and extremely reasonably priced gloves. These two pairs of Everlast gloves retail on Walmart's website for under $30.00. Boxing gloves come in different weights from 8 ounces to 16 ounces, reflecting the amount of padding and size of the glove.

The Everlast Pro-Style Training Gloves above and below come in a variety of colors.  Here, a baby pink and a lipstick red.  Who says boxing can't be feminine?

If the Bergdorf Goodman gloves are the sartorial equivalent of Apollo Creed,  then the basic Everlast gloves are the Rocky Balboas of boxing hardware.  Note that both of the heavyweights in the photo are wearing fire engine red gloves. It recently came to our attention that Warner Brothers and New Line Cinema announced plans to make another sequel to the Rocky franchise, this time a movie about Apollo Creed's son, Adonis Johnson Creed, who travels to Philadelphia to persuade Rocky (aka Sylvester Stallone) to train him after his father's death in the ring.  Click here for the official trailer. From the director of Fruitville Station, this Rocky installment features a terrific soundtrack.

 

All of this pugilistic carrying on made us a little thirsty, so we stopped into the beautiful Bar at the Baccarat Hotel, a wonderful oasis and escape from the heat and humidity.  The chandeliers are crystal extravaganzas, the barware is top of the line, the black and white painted wood floor is a nod to Versailles, and the diverse artwork is most entertaining.

The golden ambient light, combined with Valerie's goldenrod blouse and hat band, made for a bright, happy atmosphere.

Jean had a wonderful tequila concoction that was quite refreshing, especially when paired with the warmed almonds.

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UPDATE ON THE LIPSTICK DILEMMA

As you know, several posts back we wrote about the vexing problem of disappearing lipstick shades.  This stems from a universal law of physics according to which as soon as you get to like a commercial product, it will be discontinued.  In response, one of our readers, Vancouver Barbara, commented:  "After encountering the same disappointment as you, I Googled custom "lipstick maker" and found one that requires you to send them a sample of the lipstick and also the brand name and color name.  They may have formulae for the really popular colors like yours."

Readers, you will be glad to know that Vancouver Barbara (probably intuiting how lazy we are) followed up with an email in which she named the company, and even sent us a link, which we are more than happy to pass along to you:

Three Custom Color Specialists

And here's the link to their Search Discontinued Shades page.

Valerie is happy to report that they do indeed list Red Coromandel among the formulae they have recreated.  (And more than one hundred others in their Chanel list alone, so if you have a late lamented lipstick, they may have yours too.)  Minimum order is two tubes; cost is $60. We thought you ought to know as soon as possible. We haven't ordered yet, but when we do, we'll let you know.  Thank you, Vancouver Barbara!

Sometimes, Ya Just Gotta Have Those Shoes!

Eagle-eyed readers may have noticed that Jean recently started wearing flat Skechers slip-ons this summer. She paired them with black and white patterned socks above. She needed a change of pace from her trademark customized Dankso clogs with platform soles. While the Skechers were comfy, they looked a little too sporty for some occasions.

She'd noticed these spiffy black leather Jil Sander "Navy" platform slip-ons on Solestruck's website for $314.95, but isn't one to buy shoes online. Having had total foot reconstruction on both feet, Jean has to try shoes on because invariably what feels great on the left foot makes the right foot want to scream, and vice versa.

Imagine her surprise when she recently stopped into one of her favorite East Village consignment shops to see the very same shoes which were IN HER SIZE and which were ON SALE for less than 1/3 of the online price! When Jean tried them on and walked around the store, neither of her feet seemed stuck with nails or otherwise crippled in pain. Was this God's way of telling her to buy these shoes? Not one for philosophical discussion when it comes to bargain hunting, Jean is a woman of action. She bought those little suckers and brought them home.

Once she got them home and started to wear them around the apartment to break them in, however, she noticed that they were a little big and her heels seemed to slip out of the shoes when walking quickly. Egad!  Was this another one of those daydreams gone wrong?

Jean noticed the tab at the heel of each of the shoes -- a loop of leather with a chrome logo -- and thought it might provide the perfect anchor for an ankle strap.

Ah, she thought, where would one find ankle straps?  Ever resourceful (she was a Girl Scout, for heaven sake),  Jean bought two small dog collars to use as ankle straps.  In this case, Champion Breed adjustable black nylon collars for Toy dogs (8"-11") from K-Mart did the trick.  And they even had a silver metal loop (to affix a dog tag), to match the silver disc at the back of the shoe.

To compensate for the slightly large size, she added some extra cushiony Dr. Scholl's insoles in a fetching aqua blue for contrast.

Voila!  Success!  The customized version of her Jil Sander shoes now fit like a glove.

An added plus? Note the extra padding in the heel of the insole to make clunking around on New York cement sidewalks and pavement just that much more comfortable.

Jean is already on the lookout for dog collars in additional colors. Stay tuned, dear readers, for the official debut of Jean's new footwear (this was the unofficial debut) in an upcoming post.  Til then, keep on truckin'!